Friday, July 18, 2014

Brogue Nothing

M: [cleans glasses] I'm gonna see so good after this.

J: You are. It's gonna be baller.

M: Good start.

J: Do you have any mixers?

M: [walks to kitchen] We have limeade mix, lemonade mix, tonic water, and Bloody Mary mix...

J: [follows excitedly]

M: Do you want ice?

J: Nah.

M: I suppose vodka and tonic is a thing people drink...

J: Yeah! Vodka tonics!

M: Well when you put it that way, yes!

J: So a million years ago, and by that I mean several weeks if not a couple months, we watched TWO movies in ONE night. I think we got a bit overwhelmed. And then sick. And then there was a holiday. What I'm trying to say is that BWAB is back!

M: All right!

J: We're going to do our best to review the two movies we watched, both of which were rented from Liberty Hall: Big Nothing and About Time.

[BWAB review plot of Big Nothing on Wikipedia]
What did you call us? Where are we?

J: This was a terrible movie!

M: We watched that. Everybody dies. Whoops, sorry, spoiler!

J: Doesn't matter. This movie featured David Schwimmer and Simon Pegg.

M: Aka Ross and, uh, Sargent Angel.

J: It was a doozy.

[conversation ensues]

J: We need a podcast.

M: We DO need a podcast!

J: The movie was set in Oregon of all places, but was filmed primarily in Wales and Canada. You could tell.

M: The Isle of Man! Which is neither Wales nor Canada.

J: I mean, but they were on the list on Wikipedia. Maybe "primarily" was a strong word. So mostly the Isle of Man. The point is, nowhere near Oregon. Except maybe Canada, which relatively speaking, is near Oregon, but still not Oregon.

I'm English, b*tches.
M: Details. I'm not sure why it needed to be set in Oregon in the first place.

J: No. And the houses, neighborhoods, etc. were clearly not American.

M: Wasn't Ross's wife foreign or something? She had an accent... was she French? She wasn't even American.

J: [checks Wikipedia] The actress is English, but did she have an accent?

M: She definitely had an accent, I just don't remember what sort.

J: Either way, this movie was 100% all over the place.

M: [nods]

No but seriously, we should steal something.
J: It had an interesting enough murder mystery plot.

M: Did it?!

J: It definitely felt like it wanted to be a heist movie.

M: That was an honest question, actually. I kind of fell asleep... Oh! But I do remember, we were watching it, and we thought, 'oh this is interesting,' and might be some sort of mystery plot, but then it turned into a heist movie and we were just sort of aghast.

J: Yes, that's right! It turned into just another poorly-constructed British, etc. heist movie. What were they stealing? Money?

M: Yes. They were blackmailing someone who wasn't home.

J: We remember loads about this movie. Someone needed money for medical bills and decided to make some less than savory decisions to get it? And David Schwimmer was, well David Schwimmer. Ross. I'm not sure he has any other characters.

M: It's true. So when are we going to get a podcast?

J: Is Radioshack out of business yet?

M: No, I think they're still there!

J: We definitely need to go buy an on-sale microphone. Soon.
Is this really another heist film?
I'm afraid so.

M: Yes. I already feel sorry for the people that might hear us.

J: I'd like to say it will be their choice, but we definitely have some friends...

M: ...that we might guilt into listening.

J: I was thinking tie to a chair, but that's probably more normal.

M: So are we going to talk about the other movie now, or are we going to do a separate post?

J: Separate post. We owe it to the other movie.

M: Fair. Did we have anything else to say about this one?

J: Perhaps at the time? As far as I can tell, this was chosen for its awkward factor.

M: And location. At Liberty Hall.

J: Exactly. I don't particularly recommend it, if only because there are better movies out there you could be spending your time on. And Ross is annoying.

M: Stay tuned for a slightly better movie.

J: About Time!


J: I know that you were tuned, but I have to say, we got a really great comment on Facebook. Impressively great. And I feel utterly obligated to share it with you:

Esther Swanson Doesn't Simon Pegg attempt an American accent throughout that movie?

Yes, Esther, yes he does. And it was one of the first things Meredith and I both noticed, and one of the main things we wanted to point out in this post. Naturally, we forgot. So thank you! And readers, if you ever wanted to hear Simon Pegg adopt a god-awful but still funny American accent, this one's for you!

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