Brogula

J: It's like, arugula, but...

M: You should start with that.

J: Done! Welcome back to Blog With a Brogue! We're very pleased tonight to welcome a special guest blogger, my darling sister, Katie. Why don't you say a few words about yourself?

M: You should put her initials as K with an 8 or K with a T.

K: Or K D.

J: It's just K guys. There's no one else here.

M: FINE.

K: But I'm the special guest...

M: This is why we can't have more guests.

K: I bring a medical professional's knowledge to my evaluation of the content.

M: That's actually relevant to this show! Like, why does JRM have that scar on his stomach?

K: Sure as f*ck don't know.

M: And why is that lady bleeding from her mouth?

K: She cut it? Eugh, lots of pressure.

J: She's really great, guys. A big, warm, BWAB welcome to my sister Katie! So, Meredith and Kate, tell me a tiny bit about what we watched tonight!

M: Oh, well apparently everyone else thought we were watching Sleepy Hollow.

Definitely not Sleepy Hollow...

K: I did go into it thinking, why is there a vampire in Sleepy Hollow?

M: GOTCHA!

J: But really, we watched the pilot of the new NBC show Dracula...

M: [laughs]

K: [laughs] I think I might puke!

M: Now you have to come back! It's not a blog post 'till we end up crying.

J: SO DRACULA! Meredith had already seen it, but was kind enough to watch it again. Her descriptions of the brogues... and the plot, I suppose... encouraged me to want to check it out. Mere, who are your favorite characters so far?

M: Um, my favorite character by far is the not-Dracula other-young-guy, whose name I can never remember, but he writes for a newspaper and Dracula quickly takes a shining to him.

K: [whispers] Is it Neville Longbottom? [burps] I'm feeling gassy!

We repeat: That is NOT Neville Longbottom from the popular
Harry Potter series. Neither is that Justin Long, the American actor.

M: Yes.

J: [nods]

M: To be clear, he's not actually Neville, but allegedly he looks like him.

K: It's like they wanted him, but couldn't get him.

M: To be fair, Katie also thinks they wanted Justin Long for Dracula.

K: In which case, you wouldn't be writing about the show.

J: There's also a Kiera Knightly wanna-be, who also...

K: Had the baby with the girl from Twilight, who is the girl...

M: Rosalie!

K: Yeah, that's the one!

M: There's also Edith's not-husband from Downton Abbey.

The mysterious Mina and not-Knightly.

J: Best. Show. Ever.

M: To be fair... I really do think it's pretty decent! I really expected it to just be god-awful, but it's quite watchable!

J: You're not wrong. We made fun of this show for months, literally since Mere heard it was coming out, maybe a year ago. We're shocked as you are that this show might actually be worth watching.

M: And, it's worth noting that it is a mini-series, which is, as we discussed earlier, unfortunately rare here in the States.

J: Here, here! Or hear, hear...

M: Or there, there...

K: There, there...

J: Now that we're all consoled, tell me about JRM's brogue. Because I know you have a lot to say. That's Jonathan Rhys Meyers for you noobs out there.

M: Um, I daresay he's come a long way since 6 Souls. His American accent is not spot-on...

K: But it's not supposed to be!

Who is that other guy, anyway?

M: Exactly. It works well because he's supposed to be a British person posing as American. Well actually, he's supposed to be from Romania, so I don't know where he's getting the British thing from...

J: A very good point! My favorite part about the show so far is how intricate the plot is after just one episode. I found myself asking questions trying to keep up and looking forward to the next installment of this ridiculous vampire fix.

K: [silence]

M: [silence] [shrugs] On the topic of brogues, the not-Dracula other-young-guy...

K: Neville Longbottom?

M: Not-Neville-Longbottom!

K: The one who's in cahoots?

M: Yes! He has an excellent brogue. What did I say earlier? "Off the chain"?  For the record, I meant off the charts.

J: The record will show "off the chain".

M: So where are we?

J: Where are we?

M: "Katie drops loud bottle. Everyone screams."

K: Well there's too many of them!

J: That's how you know it's a good post.

M: Did we say anything?

J: Do either of you have anything to add?

K: Are we gonna talk about Tits McGee and her controversial clothing for the era?

Tits McGee and her McGees.

M: [laughs] That took me a minute! I was like "who's Tits McGee?" Then I thought about it...

K: And you figured it out! She's on vacation...

J: That's my twitter bio!

M: [dies laughing] [wheezes] "She's on vacation!"

J: She had a lot of boobs.

K: That she did.

M: That makes it sound like something...

K: Like multiple boobs...

M: Not like just... this got complicated.

K: This got real weird.

J: Maybe we should wrap it up. And the boobs.

K: All of them.

J: So if you want to watch some weird, not-quite-right brogue and/or characters we think look like other people, plus lots of boobs, check out Dracula.

M: [can't breathe] It's really great.

K: [laughing] Oh, wow.

M: Whew.

K: I feel like "lots of boobs" is misleading...

J: Yeah but when you get there...

M: You'll know.

J: Till next time!

Tha-tha-tha-that's all folks!